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Todd's Family

When I first 'met' Todd online the whole online thing was very new to me. So when he starting telling me about his wonderful life and family at first I wondered if he was just telling me all of these wonderful things to make his life seem so perfect. To me it sounded like something out of an American TV programme - like the 'Andy Griffith Show' or something along those lines. I never 'didn't' believe him, if you know what I mean, it just all seemed 'too' perfect. I should have realised that it was just like that.

Here was someone I was attracted to that was well educated, had a great sense of humour, was honest, listened to me (and that takes a bit of getting used to let me tell you!) and training to be a helicopter pilot, he came from a very close-knit family who loved being together and he liked me! It HAD to be some kind of set up - right?

It wasn't! When I got to meet his family, soon after moving to America, they were everything he said they were and more. More importantly they welcomed Timothy and I with open hearts, open minds and open arms. They never (to my knowledge anyway) questioned Todd's and my love for each other and Timothy and I have felt like family from the moment we met. What amazed me is their capacity to love each of their children/grandchildren without prejudice. They treat each one the same - there are no favourites. This is something that is new to me as there were (and still are) glaringly obvious favourites in the family that I had grown up with.

Ed is the typical matriach of the family. He is a man of few words, but when he speaks, you listen. Whenever Todd or I need guidance or words of advice, Ed is always first on the list. He has a great sense of humour and our children adore their Zadie to bits!

Bev is the mother who is there whenever you need her for any kind of advice. She has been a nurse for over 45 years so when anything goes wrong with anyone in our household, her number is the first that I dial, and believe me, she's been a rock throughout many illnesses in our family. She's always willing to listen and also has a wonderful sense of humour - even though she's constantly teased by her children, she loves every moment of it and the love she has is obvious for the world to see.

Jeffry - what can I say about Jeff. I also met Jeff in the chat room where I met his brothers. He had been to New Zealand a few times, and had actually visited Kerikeri during one of those trips. We hit it off straight away and he was actually planning to come and stay with me when he made his next trip to New Zealand. Of course, I'd moved to America by this stage, so that wasn't possible. Jeff is a great big brother - quick with advice, laughter, slap on the back or an opinion. One thing I learnt quickly about Jeff is his utter devotion to all things family. This was something new to me, after my upbringing. It's refreshing to see, yet took a bit of getting used to.

Cindy is the big sister. Cindy left home when she was 18 and started her own family. She managed to live and work all over the States. She was an accomplished cosmotologist and ran several successful businesses. She raised a family of four children and their love for her was obvious the first time I met them. She always had a smile on her face and if there was a room full of people you would find Cindy with the children as she adored them. Kasia was swept away by her Aunty Cindy and her love for life. Timothy too adored his Aunty Cinty and whenever we made it to Phoenix, staying with her was one of his top priorities, she had all of the latest gadgets and toys for him to play with too! For some more on Cindy - click here.

Then of course comes Terry. What can I say about Terry?! Not too much actually (long story) except that he and Todd are identical twins and that is probably the best description of them. They obviously have their own personalities, but I have never met two people similar in so many ways. They don't have that 'psychic link' that you read about, but they do have a connection that is beyond anything I've ever known before. They have small differences in their personalities (which football team they support, food they eat, music preferences, choice in clothes) but other than that they are pretty similar, their sense of humour is similar, they sound the same, they have the same profession ... etc, etc. They are close and when they are together, for me, it's like all of the pieces of the puzzle just fit into place. Unfortunately Terry and I don't speak to each other anymore, not through my choosing, but I have to respect his misguided decision.

This photo was taken in February 2004. This was the last time that the whole family was together. Thank goodness there were many photos taken so that they can be treasured by every one of us.